March 12 - And the Oscar Goes to...

Matthew 6:1-4

Do you know what your love language is? How you give love or receive love? I know that I am definitely a Words of Affirmation person. I am all about giving words and receiving words. That is how I most feel loved, when someone shares words of love and appreciation with me. Do you know who is not a Words of Affirmation person? My husband. Yes, if you were wondering, it's been a growing experience for both of us! So when I do the dishes, or clean the bathroom, or make dinner, I want to be showered with praise and thanks and appreciation. He will, of course, say thank you for making dinner, and he often responds to my dish-doing by taking out the trash or doing some other act of service. To him, actions speak louder than words.

But I want words, so I sit and I stew. Doesn't he care that I did all this work to clean the kitchen?! Why didn't he thank me after I scrubbed the bathtub for him?! Doesn't he care that I put new salt in the salt shakers?? He uses those salt shakers!! He should be bowing at my feet right now! I stew and get frustrated because I haven't received praise and adoration for small household tasks that I feel I deserve an Oscar for completing.

And that makes me stop and think. Why do I feel I deserve an award for these tasks? My husband also does dishes, and laundry, and he does all of our budgeting and finance tracking. It's not like he doesn't do anything to help out our little family. I realize that I am only doing these tasks in order to get praise. Why do I feel entitled to recognition for things that I should be doing anyway?

This is the question underneath today's passage. And Jesus' answer? You shouldn't. The passage talks about giving to the needy. It can be so easy to want to flaunt our good deeds, to share our "accomplishments for the Kingdom." And sometimes there are some amazing stories to tell after we've spent a day or a week serving. But those are stories about God, not us. Jesus says to give in secret, to let your service be just between you and him. We should all give our time, money, energy to our neighbors in need. And for that, we are not entitled to recognition, except from the Lord.

This humbles me - as a wife, and as a servant of the Lord and the church. Maybe for you it's not your spouse that you want recognition from, but your parents, or your boss, or maybe even your children.  But what Jesus says is that when we start looking for recognition from others, our works and service becomes for others - and not for him. I pray to become one who works, serves, and gives joyfully and humbly, not out of the need for recognition, but out of a desire to love and serve God and those around me with open hands and a whole spirit.

Reflect:
1. Are there areas in your life where you give or serve or work in order to be recognized rather than to follow God's commands?
2. Maybe you don't do the above, but where in your life do you find it easy to fall into the trap of taking praise or criticism/lack of praise too much to heart?
3. How are you giving to those around you in need? Pray and ask God to show you where he wants you to serve with open hands.